I don’t have to love my body, I have to love MYSELF

I always feel like I’m waiting for this magic moment when all the stars align. I want ‘perfect’ balance in my life and thrive – this is what I tell myself and it’s a problem because I feel that ‘fact’ will make me happy. I will automatically love myself. Everything that I am, flaws included. That is such a jaded way to think, a little immature.

Continue Reading

i did a thing …

When I was asked to be interviewed for the Half Size Me Podcast I had many reservations. What could I possibly have to share? Will anyone care? I’m not at my goal weight, should I turn it down? Of course those are legitimate concerns but I knew the right answer was to just go for it. Continue Reading

my NSV’s so far

I’m honestly the #1 critic of myself, always saying things I would never tell a friend. Any success I’ve had so far is really stifling because is it really good enough? I always feel like if I’m not doing something at 100% then it’s a fail. I know in reality it isn’t but I’ve just been conditioned this way. In the past few months my weight loss has slowed way down and it makes me pretty nervous. Instead of big drops like 9-14lbs a month its been more like 3-6lbs. In January I even gained 1lbs, it’s so minimal but I can honestly say I’m scared. Is this it? Am I done? Continue Reading

the easy way out – not so much

Here is a conversation I have pretty much every week since June 27th, 2017

Me: Yes, I’ve had weight loss surgery.

Random Person: Oh wow that’s amazing but isn’t it the easy way out?

Me: No, not it’s not *as every fiber of my being wants to totally yell at the person*

Continue Reading

My Leap

I took the leap, I applied for full time position as a photographer for a pretty big company. You guys might be thinking what does it have to do with weight loss and I’m here to tell you my friends it’s everything. I was always scared to apply just like I was to do a new work out or calorie count or do extra 10 laps every time I’m in the pool. Continue Reading

Celebrating my Success

Celebrating my Success has never come easy for me, on my weight loss journey I always have this big number in the back of my mind. I need to loose 185lbs … I just HAVE to. Any sort of actual success I’ve had with weight loss falls by the waist side because of that gigantic number. Continue Reading