working on it … forever!

I have type 2 diabetes and been living with it for 10+ years now, at first when I got the news I tried every diet under the sun – Atkins was the worst! I think I did it for a month before I realized it is slowly killing me not fixing me. I did Weight Watchers Online for a few months but also gave up on it when I didn’t see results after 3 months and since then I gave up on dieting. I realized any diet changes I make are not on my plate … it’s in my mind. I need to almost rewire my brain and figure out all the wonderful things I can eat without having my weight or diabetes get worse. In the past 4 years I have made the most progress because I’m learning to listen to my body, it’s very hard for me to be in tune with it because I treated it like crap for a while. Since my diagnosis my A1C went from 14+ to 6.8 and I’m still working on it with help of medication. My body fat went from 88% to 49.9% which is a big deal, the only thing that I still cant get a proper grip on is my scale weight. I realize my body composition is changing and that’s fantastic however the scale is really not reflecting the efforts I’m making. I’ve actually gained ‘scale weight’ over the past year even though I can walk faster, swim better and breath lighter. I’m by no means giving up and I will keep working  … forever!

Recently I’ve been feeling interesting things: for example over this winter I realized after I eat and go outside I become extra cold … apparently the process of digestion takes away heat from the rest of me and I’m cold. Another thing is I’ve been COLD, it may seem like a normal thing but for me it’s pretty strange because I don’t usually feel cold at all. In fact winter was my 2nd favorite season until very recent.

This all brings me to the topic at hand, last night after Mother’s Day dinner with Vlad’s mom I felt a little strange. I ate something I don’t normally eat at the restaurant so I excused myself and went to the restroom. It was so strange, I’ve only had this happen to me once before last summer. I broke out in a cold sweat, nauseous and with an insane stomach ache. I honestly thought it would all come back up … thankfully it didn’t (sorry for the details). I later realized the dish I ate must have just been too fatty for me because I had the hardest time digesting it … I actually felt the digestion process – it’s weird! Note to self : don’t eat the Satsivi dish no matter how delicious you think it it. Don’t get me wrong it’s amazing but I think my stomach just can’t process it. Today I’m taking it easy because I don’t want that happening again, plus I think I’m getting sick because yesterday I got a cold sore on my lip and that usually follows with strep for me. Not feeling great today 🙁

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